Understanding China, One Blog at a Time

An American in China

Archive for January 20th, 2012

McDonalds to Poison More Chinese- opening 225 New Stores

Posted by w_thames_the_d on January 20, 2012

McDonalds will open 225 stores in china this year. They hope to make the next generation of little one child wastrels as obese as the latest generation of human waste.

What a sight it is to see the teetering ancient Chinese grandparents as they shepherd along the latest in Chinese idiocy as they engorge their fat little heads with a taste of Americana. The old people are just being kind, after all, they are just happy they have enough to eat.

For those aged 60 and above , their childhood was spent hiding from the boiling cauldrons of their neighbors crockpot as cannibalism was rampant in the late fifties due to poor government planning and natural disaster.

My question is wtf are the Chinese so slow in ordering at Mickey D’?

I mean I get it, they think slow, walk so and pay their bills slow, but isn’t the idea of McDonald’s fast food?
But of course the Chinese , in possession of the ‘ fuk up anything pleasurable or simple’ gene , make buying food at the mick a painful process indeed.

First they have to ask questions… WTF is there to ask? You ve got two choices, chicken or meat, grilled or fried. Everything else is derivative. You can get two suggestions of what alleges to be pickles, a scoop of tomoatoes and bread. These condiments go on everything.

And I feel you ancient Chinese people who are astounded that no, meals cooked in civilization do not have body parts from the neighbor s kids who by virtue of a defective speed gene, were not fast enough to avoid the dinner plate of some distant relative. Yeah it’s cool we don’t eat our young and no you won find dog or cat on the menu, but why do you ask so many questions at the counter.

It’s a faking hunk of meat, you also get a coke, maybe some fries, no big mystery there!

I guess the problem may stem from the fact that absent the firm push of the proverbial shaft from the now pickled great chairman Mao, their decision making gene has atrophied rendering them something akin to unisex robots whose goal in life is to mash the up and down elevator button simultaneously then enter only to make hooting and howling noises upon learning that no, arrival at floor seven is not available from this elevator bank. Then of course they have to bend their moon shaped forms over to re hoist all of those cheap and worn paper bags that the Chinese are so fond of lugging with them whereever they go, and then leave the elevator in that painful manner that they call perambulation.
But back to Mickey d s
So the ancients gather at the altar of mac goodness as their Rolly Polly offspring aka the little hunks of inhumanity who will soon enough be footing the bill that enables these ancients to live, look om in that one child policy mixture of ignorance and disdain. As they have no brothers nor sister and have been spoon fed all they need for their entire miserable lives, the ham fisted youth cry beg and scream as they can’t wait to eat.
The ancients do the best they can, standing ther in high water pants that look like fifth generation good will woolen britches and mismatched shirts.
The whole time I just sit and stare wondering , do we really fear a country filled with this kind of people?

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How the Chicoms Control the Chinese

Posted by w_thames_the_d on January 20, 2012

“Over the past five years, stability maintenance, known as “weiwen” in Chinese, has become a multiagency juggernaut that relies on a sophisticated menu of Internet censorship, the harassment of blacklisted troublemakers and an industrial complex of paid informants and contractors. The vast bureaucracy extends from the Politiburo Standing Committee’s chief law enforcer, Zhou Yongkang, to neighborhood “safety patrol” volunteers on the lookout for Falun Gong members and low-level clashes that can mushroom into large-scale disturbances.”

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Chinese Hygiene in a Photo

Posted by w_thames_the_d on January 20, 2012

Here’s a shot of a guy cutting his toenails as he drapes his legs from a modern Chinese ‘coolie cart’.
I guess I should commend him on his sanitary habits but dread the though of sloughing through the bits and pieces of 13,400,000,000 hunks of snipped Chinese toenail that must litter the streets of this place.

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