Understanding China, One Blog at a Time

An American in China

Archive for June 29th, 2012

Happy Chinese and Coming Vietnamese War

Posted by w_thames_the_d on June 29, 2012

The King, aka Gowron, feeds us our daily dose of China news

All rise for The King


China preps up for War…… against Vietnam?!?!?!? ( the same guys who kicked their ass, well it was a mutual loss. The Chinese said fuck you I’m taking my ball and going home (and took all sorts of capital materials from the north, Machinery, life stock, women you know…. all sorts of Nanjing-like shit). In the gamer world (which I don’t belong to as much anymore, as I plan to go into the REAL game of life when I get back to democratic Canada. Lol if only I were American right? (for starters I could become a sexy sex machine. (Marine, and be stationed in Jacorea, and help defend it against the big Stinky). Anyways in the gamer world this tactic of fustration is called a “Rage Quit, or QQ (Quit Qrying, aka tear drops from the eyes (the tails of the Q).. because Vietnam held them back with the dreaded…. VC (now just militiamen). The problem with war with Vietnam is…… the UNITED NATIONS. (It’s very shameful for say a founding nation of the UN to say act like the vanquished demonic Japan isn’t it?). What will likely happen is…. a limited war, (where the VC will say how are you GI Joe, you have been misunderstanding about the goings of the war……) And other nations of the UN security council will have to intervene. While Vietnamese allies in that SE asian blob of land (I’m still not sure which is the derivitative ethnicity, India or some Indo-Asian? Many whom have been fucked over by the Hans over an eon…..)Believe it or not China. Nobody likes your bully boy ways. It didn’t work for The Tannen clann from Back to the Future, where he and his ancestors and ascendants terroized the hard working Hill Valleyans, who like only wanted to live a nice peaceful Calgarian (Mormon), existance, of nice quite pleansantness, moist back yards that are cradles of life…And like Marty McFly, a hero (namely the UN), will come and make you eat manure, China. But that’s ok you people just about eat anything, without a motor….. and as a former glue eating, magnet and pencil munching weird student. That’s like EWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

But the truly fucked up thing? is… Vietnam sent monks to reestablish monestaries on the Parcell Islands… so China is going to kill a bunch of peaceful monks who only wish to help convince disembodied spirits to kindly go into the light, to have another crack at life….. (reincarnation and cool shit like that).

As for the Philipens….. and Spatleys… Does China REALLY want to provoke TWO heavily armed nations, nukes or no nukes, wouldn’t this enflame the world…. who will buy your shit China? say didn’t the Nazis already try this, and the Romans, and Greeks, and and and and and, the Japanese? (ohhh irony).

The mother of all ironies is that this would be a SMALL time war. a limited war. That humans don’t read about much, sort of like those bush wars in Africa, or the Falklands.

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Stupid Chinese Mistake Sex Toy for Rare Mushroom

Posted by w_thames_the_d on June 29, 2012

File this under “What a bunch of dumbasses”
According to chinasmack, a bunch of Chinese came across what they thought was a rare large mushroom. In reality they thing is a sex toy for men. The villagers called the local news who reported on the rare find…

The video is hilarious as the morons poke and prod at the thing and it is obvious what the device was built for.
File this under another reason why this place was better off under Mao. At least then they only could harm each other.
Click here or cut and paste the url below


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