WTF is Up with Chinese Censors?

My google has been acting up lately and distorting some of the responses for my google searches but wtf is up with the chicom censors?

I came to work with the intention of doing as much as I did yesterday and the day before as i thought of how to do a post on the fact i need a haircut. What I was looking for was a pictorial representation of what my shaggy head now looks like and was thinking of something like this…

So, being relatively intelligent I googled ‘long hair bum’ on google images and was quite surprised by the results. Rather than seeing the hippie’esque fellow shown above (for this one I googled ‘long hair hippie man’), I was greeted by the most bizarre array of men and women, mostly men, in the most intricate acts of coupling imaginable. Quickly I closed the browser and wiped the sweat from my brow. Then I began to think, wtf are the chicom censors doing? I have heard they are blokcing porn sites, but they dont have the skill sets to block www.mantoolsinc.com or savagestudhounds.uk?

Always pushing the envelope, I have just performed the same search with similar results. I guess the moral of the story is that try as they might, China never seems to get it right.

China Vows to Stop Academic Fraud!

From the chinadaily. China says that in order to an ‘innovative couintry by 2020’ they must stop academic fraud. They have also vowed to cut corruption and houses of skin worship and look how that’s working out for them.

…. good luck China

chinadaily

On Your Friendly Neighborhood Chinese Legislator

from here
” On July 20, 1999, the CCP and Jiang Zemin declared their suppression of the populace who believe in “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance”. Jiang said, “How could it be possible that Marxist theory, the materialism and atheism believed by our Communists would not be able to defeat F G’s (full name redacted) teachings?”

In communism we trust…

Beijing in a Photo

Propaganda and the Communist Party in China

from here: In the early times, the CCP’s main foreign propaganda channel was its mouthpiece, Xinhua News Agency. In December 1955, Mao Zedong, then the head of the CCP, ordered Xinhua News Agency to “bring the Earth under its control” and “to send its reporters to the different regions in the world as soon as possible and to disseminate its own news”.

China Photo

Sensitive Me Poll- In China

Chinese “Parental Love”- Sad Text From a Chinese Friend Explaining Chinese Parenting

Chinese Dragon Lady Parenting- The Reality of Chinese Parenting

I think all of us should parent like the Chinese do, look at the joyful expressions that grace the faces of those who hail from the grand center country(China) and if this is not enough to warm the cockles of your cold hearts, read the following text messages from me to a Chinese friend. My friend just took the entrance exam for masters classes in China and was disappointed, this is actually what was said.
The reality of the following texts is the misery that Chinese people feel as they are human ‘doings’ not ‘beings’. When money becomes one’s life, the value of a human can either be monetized or shoved aside.

Friend “I understand chinese parents love for child is so strong”
me- why
friend-“because they paid too much attention on their children and expect their response.once anything changes they can hardly accept.”
me- “did you see them yet?
friend- “No I didnt meet them yet . i just suddenly can feel. cuz i paid too much attention on one things. but now i know i shouldnt have.”
me-“you mean they will be angry about your tests scores”(side note, they did ok but not well enough to get into the top Chinese school)
friend-“yes angry and desperate”
me-“why”
friend -“they would doubt everything . they would doubt if they should have had babies. if their kid love them. if they would die lonely without childs love.
me- sorry
friend-“my aunt regret she has two children , she says they dont love her.”

China Biding Her Time

Here is a snippet from this site. It is common in China for people to echo Deng’s words of the fact that China is playing it coy and biding its time to one day make its move on the world stage.. excerpt : Under this general background, the CCP patriarch leader Deng Xiaoping proposed a foreign policy of “hiding our capacities and biding our time, [11] and waiting for the right time to come to make huge accomplishments”, aiming at cheating the international communities into lower their guards and executing his strategic plan of letting China accumulate forces and then dominate the world later. To foster a “good” image, walk out of the predicament, and step up its propaganda and infiltration to foreign countries, the CCP established, in January 1991, the Information Office of the State Council, as the highest body for coordinating its overseas propaganda works. [12] In March 1993, the Information Office of the State Council and the Foreign Propaganda Group of CCP Central Committee, which shared one work unit under two nameplates, were listed directly under CCP Central Committee and are controlled directly by the Party. [13] In the same year, the Foreign Propaganda Group was renamed as Foreign Propaganda Office. [14] All provinces, autonomous regions, and municipalities that are directly under the Central Government have also set up their own corresponding Foreign Propaganda Office

In Praise of the Chinese Dragon Mother or Rise of the Commie Mommie

I guess some Chinese lady who was rescued from purgatory (prc) and then moved to the land of enduring greatness and pleasure (usa) wrote a book touting Chinese parenting skills. I want to be the first to congratulate this visionary on her ability to share with us the secrets ‘lie’ in the ‘maternal instincts’ of the typical Chinese mother and in my lowly blog, would like to articulate just why it is that I agree with this dragon monster/mommie.

Ok, a caveat is that I have not read the book but think I understand its gist, so I am going to wing it here.
What the dragon mother/commie mommie got right:
-love and affection are things best reserved for prized possessions like your car, your bank account, your favorite KTV squeeze, but not things to be wasted on a little brat who entered your life after your first ill-conceived attempt at coupling
-“I’m sorry for disappointing you” and “What university do i need to attend so you won’t hate me so much?” should be the first words that the one-child policy burden you now hold in your angry arms should utter, and not things like mama and dada
-musical instruments and English books should be the first ‘toys’ that your future disappointment holds in their beefy mitts, after all what good is a kid if he cant finance your miserable retirement
-“I love you” wtf is that, all these three words do is clutter up the mind of an aspiring cash machine/child, replace with “what can i get from others so i can provide for my parents”
-do not allow this little burden to wander from the sight of your doddering parents- it is them after all who will parent this little burden as you are too busy trying to pay for your house and it was there idea that you give life to this little mal-content anyway
-choose and plan all of the little problem child’s days so that none of their time is wasted on useless things such as “thinking, creating, interacting with other normal kids, just being a kid”. Instead trade off these activities for useful things like having them do “anything that gets the little bastard out of my hair and also will provide them with a skill that I can monetize in the future as I gave birth to the thing and per confucius you owe me your life anyway.”
-as soon as that plate hardens on your little burden’s skull, you need to ship them off to some prep school so they cohabitate with pack of other socially-inept malcontents who harbor as much resentment for their parents as your bothersome disappointment does…
-when and if your little burden forces its way into your life and it is still young, then demand that they tug at your apron strings and do not wander far from your site, after all, it would be a pity for them to mature emotionally at a level equal to that of people around the world
-yes suicide is a valid option after failing to enter the school that you and your husband demanded that the little cretin enter. The one-child policy allows us a ‘mulligan’ if you do so and maybe this time we will make a winner
-when your little burden looks at you with curiosity in their little eyes and inquires “momma, why does daddy reek of stale cigarettes and KTV coozle?” it is acceptable, nah mandatory, to smite them upon their little noggin for speaking when not spoken to. For such infractions it is acceptable to ground them until they are of the marrying age and buy you a house.

Please feel free to comment…

(legal disclaimer- while not a certified psychologist, I suggest you attempt these practices at your own risk- or ship your child off to a Chinese nanny.)